SONG LYRICS
Richard Cheese has written and recorded numerous original songs, including "I'm Blue No Matter Who," "I Love Boobies," "Christmas In Las Vegas," "Let's Lounge," and "Baby Stay The Fuck Away From Me."
See complete lyrics below.
See complete lyrics below.
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All of Richard Cheese's original songs are available on "SNAPPIER THAN EVER: THE ORIGINAL SONGS" album, released in 2022!
01 LET'S LOUNGE 02 DRINK TO HAWAII 03 I LOVE BOOBIES 04 CHRISTMAS IN LAS VEGAS 05 THE FRIDAY SONG 06 VACCINE DADDY 07 BABY STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME 08 VEGAS ON MY MIND 09 HANNUKAH IN LAS VEGAS 10 I WAS DRUNK 11 DENVER AIRPORT SONG 12 RICHARD CHEESE'S BIRTHDAY SONG 13 SONG FOR ADULT FILM 14 MY MICROPHONE IS BROKEN |
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"Christmas In Las Vegas"
by Richard Cheese Lyrics by Mark Jonathan Davis An original song from the 2006 Richard Cheese & Lounge Against The Machine "Silent Nightclub" CD. Christmas in Las Vegas Decorate your tree with chips Let's roll a yo beneath the mistletoe While that angel strips Rudolph sold the sled, now he's betting on red In a casino made out of gingerbread Christmas in Las Vegas It's a trip! The wise men are rolling sevens The elves are doubling down Light a candle, and pull the handle I love that jingling sound Every showgirl and boy ride in a sleigh of joy Pulled by eight tiny tigers eating Siegfried & Roy Christmas in Las Vegas What a town! Santa brought me two aces I wonder if I should split? Hey waitress, bring me a drink, while I think What would Jesus hit? The strip lights are all twinkling There's no room at the inn But because 'tis the season They'll comp a suite for Mary at the Wynn! Christmas in Las Vegas It's Bethlehem with Bling! Let's hope the dealer brings four newborn kings 'Cause my baby needs a brand new pair of five golden rings Christmas in Las Vegas really swings! Cha cha cha ching I said Christmas in Las Vegas really swings! "Christmas In Las Vegas" by Richard Cheese
Lyrics written by Mark Jonathan Davis © Copyright 2006 Mark Jonathan Davis Published by IdeatownUSA Recordings (ASCAP) |
"I Love Boobies"
by Richard Cheese Lyrics by Mark Jonathan Davis, Kristen Wiig, Annie Mumolo Richard Cheese performed this all-new original song in the hit 2021 comedy movie "Barb & Star Go To Vista Del Mar"!
Good evening! I'm Richard Cheese, thank you. here's a little tune I wrote with my bosom buddies Barb & Star... What I really, really love as I Look around this place Are all the sets of boobies And I want them in my face Hello boobies! I love boobies I love gazongas I love knockers And chimichangas I love melons, and bon-bons, and winnebagos I'll take a big chest of shirt potatoes 'Cause I love boobs (piano solo) I love boobies I love ti-ti's A couple yabbos And dos chi-chi's Jumblies and jigglers, fun bags and cans If you've got a breast, let me give you a hand Hooters and jugs and galactic probes This song should win at least two Golden Globes 'Cause I love boobs And irish draperies I love boobs I'm talkin' ta-ta's I love boobs I'm bonkers for honkers I love boobs Thanks for the mammaries I love boobs! "I Love Boobies" by Richard Cheese
Lyrics written by Kristen Wiig, Annie Mumolo, and Mark Jonathan Davis © Copyright 2021 Lionsgate / Mark Jonathan Davis Published by IdeatownUSA Recordings (ASCAP) |
"I'm Blue No Matter Who"
by Richard Cheese Lyrics by Mark Jonathan Davis An all-new original song from the 2024 Richard Cheese album "Blue No Matter Who." Lyric video drawn and directed by Mark Jonathan Davis. No matter where I go No matter what I do I'll never find another you I'm blue no matter who The sunset falls in red On the ocean's twilight hue The stars all fade To violet shade I'm blue no matter who The autumn leaves are sand White roses cry their dew No glint of green To be seen I'm blue no matter who Together we were sunshine Amber mornings, golden days Pink valentines burgundy wines, But now they're only grays Every love turned lonely Every lie came true I'll never find another you I'm blue no matter who (piano solo) Silver clouds rain teardrops No moonlight to break through The night comes back The sky is black I'm blue no matter who No matter where I go No matter what I do I'll never find another you I'm blue no matter who I'll never find another you I'm blue no matter who "I'm Blue No Matter Who" by Richard Cheese
Lyrics written by Mark Jonathan Davis © Copyright 2024 Mark Jonathan Davis / World Art Supply Published by IdeatownUSA Recordings (ASCAP) 
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"Vegas On My Mind"
by Richard Cheese Lyrics by Mark Jonathan Davis Richard Cheese's 2020 album "Numbers Of The Beast" featured this all-new original song about missing Las Vegas. "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, I'm Richard Cheese, thank you. You know, I've been dreaming about a little town out Nevada way. And even when I can't be there, I still think about it every day...." Every day my brain goes on a trip All roads lead me to the strip You say potato, I say chips I've got Vegas on my mind I only buy cherries in a set of three A baby diaper means craps to me Adele's 21 album? That's blackjack! See? I've got Vegas on my mind I watch "Full House," I shop at Ace Hardware And every 7-Eleven is nice When I see an onion My immediate thought is dice A plastic fork dispenser is a slot machine My salads are Caesars, I wear Lucky Jeans And that's where you'll find a hard seventeen I've got Vegas on my mind When I see a hubcap I think roulette The elevator buttons are a keno bet And there's a royal flush in my toilet I've got Vegas on my mind My chest X-ray shows prime ribs I've got a Flamingo in my yard My fireplace has a poker And when I can't fall asleep, I count cards I'll buy a cozy casino just for me and you I can't wait to see that deluxe strip view Tonight my credit score is 702 I've got Vegas on my mind I've got an itch To get rich I've got Vegas on my mind "Vegas On My Mind" by Richard Cheese
Lyrics written by Mark Jonathan Davis © Copyright 2020 Mark Jonathan Davis Published by IdeatownUSA Recordings (ASCAP) |
"Baby Stay The Fuck Away From Me"
by Richard Cheese Lyrics by Mark Jonathan Davis Richard Cheese's album "Numbers Of The Beast" includes this new original song about romance during the coronavirus pandemic. Is your pulse racing? Do your toes curl? Is your temperature rising? I've got bad news girl You have the most beautiful face I've ever seen But statistically you've probably got Covid19 So baby stay the fuck away from me I have a passion for distancing socially And as much as I love you I'm gonna keep upwind of you Baby stay the fuck away from me I miss your soft kisses And your tender embraces But we can't 69 With masks on our faces I long to suck your spit and put my fingers in your mouth like I used to do But speaking clinically that would put me in the ICU So baby stay the fuck away from me Or else you'll be my ex permanently And as much as I love you I'm fine with just a picture of you Baby stay the fuck away from me You know that I love you When I masturbate I'll be thinking of you Baby stay the fuck away from me "Baby Stay The Fuck Away From Me" by Richard Cheese
Lyrics written by Mark Jonathan Davis © Copyright 2020 Mark Jonathan Davis Published by IdeatownUSA Recordings (ASCAP) |
"Drink To Hawaii"
by Johnny Aloha Lyrics by Mark Jonathan Davis Johnny Aloha's 2010 CD "Lavapalooza" included this all-new original song about tropical cocktails. I've been thirsting for an island vacation But I can't afford the airline reservation So I'll use my imagination To make the trip come true, I'll take a sip or two Of tropical libation... I'll take a Chi Chi, to Waikiki And a Zombie, to Ka'anapali I'll use a Mai Tai, to get to Kauai I'll ride a Hurricane, to Lanikai I'll drink a Lava Flow, And dream of old Hilo Make it a Blue Hawaiian 'Cause I'm not in Waimanalo Oh yes, I guess that I'll just drink to Hawaii And taste paradise on my lips Oh well, I think I'll have to drink to Hawaii Since I can't afford the trips I'll fly a Pina Colada, to Ala Moana And a Bahama Mama, to Ka'a'awa A Planters Punch, to Hanauma Bay I'll go with Dr. Funk, to the Hana Highway Thanks to a Scorpion Bowl, I'll see the Halona Blow Hole And with a Pineapple Passion, I'll meet a gal from Dole Oh yes, I guess that I'll just drink to Hawaii And taste paradise on my lips I think I'll have to drink to Hawaii Since I can't afford the trips To Kapalua there's a Puka Puka carrying me I'll climb Diamond Head with a Daiquiri I'll sail a Navy Grog to Pearl City I'll take a Lychee Martini to my Molokini wahine Oh yes, I guess I'll have to drink to Hawaii And taste paradise on my lips I say let's all drink to Hawaii Since we can't afford the trips Oh no I can't afford the trips Since I can't afford the trips I'll drink to Hawaii "Drink To Hawaii" by Johnny Aloha
Lyrics written by Mark Jonathan Davis © Copyright 2010 Mark Jonathan Davis Published by IdeatownUSA Recordings (ASCAP) |
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"Hannukah In Las Vegas"
by Richard Cheese Lyrics by Mark Jonathan Davis An original holiday song from the 2013 Richard Cheese "Cocktails With Santa" CD, sung to the same tune as "Christmas In Las Vegas." Hannukah in Las Vegas It's a festival of neon lights Bet a dollar and eat some challah The strip is kosher tonight There's a menorah on the Tropicana And a stripper wearing just a yarmulke Hannukah in Las Vegas Eight swingin' nights The Baruch Atah Adonai blessing Is sung by a showgirl choir When it's time to light the candles each night Penn & Teller set them on fire All the yentas make stops at the Forum Shops And the tzimmes is made with Carrot Tops Hannukah in Las Vegas Try the lambchops Aleph, Bet, Gimel, Dalet Moses went to the Luxor To shoot craps with Pharaoh As he rolled the dice, he said real nice Let my people Yo! The cantors are playing poker They use chocolate coins for chips All the rabbis bet on dreidel roulette And the casino moyel takes tips Hannukah in Las Vegas It's a real gelt trip! Well, the shamash here is The Stratosphere And David Copperfield makes the latkes disappear Hannukah in Las Vegas, Mazeltov Sammy's watching from above I said Hannukah in Las Vegas What's not to love "Hannukah In Las Vegas" by Richard Cheese
Lyrics written by Mark Jonathan Davis © Copyright 2006, 2013 Mark Jonathan Davis Published by IdeatownUSA Recordings (ASCAP) Recorded in 2013 for the "Richard Cheese: Cocktails With Santa" album |
"Let's Lounge"
by Richard Cheese Lyrics by Mark Jonathan Davis Richard Cheese's salute to laziness appeared on his 2011 album "A Lounge Supreme." Well, there's trouble brewin' all around Crime is up and the dollar's down The sea is black and the air is brown And the meter is in the red Here's the message I'm deliverin' If this mean old world that we're livin' in Makes you feel like givin' in Well I say, yes, go ahead! Let's Lounge, that's my battle cry Let's Lounge, don't even try Let's Lounge, no more thinkin' Let's Lounge, just keep drinkin' Leave your troubles laying around Get up, Sit down, and Let's Lounge Your beer is warm and your steak is cool You're losing sleep and you're failing school Your immediate supervisor is a tool Life can drive you up the wall You starve and strive and slave and sweat You try so hard, but nowhere you get But do not fight, and do not fret Why stand when you can fall? Let's Lounge, drop the ball Let's Lounge, cancel that wakeup call Let's Lounge, life can be fair Let's Lounge, if you don't care Leave your troubles laying around Get up, Sit down, and Let's Lounge Everyone's after that pot of gold But I bet it weighs a ton It may be customary to seek a bowl of cherries But fill mine with Ketel One So if your lady's loose and your money's tight If you're in a tunnel without a light Here's a phrase for you to recite But don't bother singin' it right Let's Lounge, fill up your glass Let's Lounge, get on your ass Let's Lounge, buy three TV's Let's Lounge, listen to Richard Cheese Leave your troubles laying around Get up, Sit down, and Let's Lounge Give your worries the brush and we'll paint the town Get up, Sit down and Let's Lounge "Let's Lounge" by Richard Cheese
Lyrics written by Mark Jonathan Davis © Copyright 2011 Mark Jonathan Davis Published by IdeatownUSA Recordings (ASCAP) and Asian Boss Music (ASCAP) |
"Vaccine Daddy"
by Richard Cheese Lyrics by Mark Jonathan Davis Richard Cheese's album Big Cheese Energy" features this new original song about Covid-19 vaccinations. Hey baby has the virus got you afraid Masks you've worn and home you've stayed If the pandemic has got you lonesome and blue Well honey I've got the remedy for you Other boys might buy you diamonds and pearls But I know what's on the mind of all the girls I have something you need, I've got what you want Let the rest stand in line, I'll get you to the front I'm your Vaccine Daddy I've got the connections (Vaccine Daddy) To get you your injections (Vaccine Daddy) I'm gonna treat all your troubles (Vaccine Daddy) And hey my doses are doubles No more nights of isolation You're gonna dig my big inoculation Vaccine Daddy Let me examine you and check if you're warm I can see you've properly filled out your form Take off your coat and roll up your shirt All the gals will tell you that it doesn't hurt My sharp is sharp, my syringe goes deep My hypodermic's longer than a cvs receipt I've got a little pad with some alcohol And once my needle's in, in love you'll fall With your Vaccine Daddy Your symptoms won't worsen (Your Vaccine Daddy) After some of my nursin' (Your Vaccine Daddy) No one's better (Vaccine Daddy) With a super spreader Tonight please invite me up your sleeve If you're anti-vax, I'll make you believe Vaccine Daddy I'm gonna jab you, and stick you And poke you, and prick you I've got a lollipop you can lick, too And I brought a little band-aid for your shoulder to stick to Pfizer? I hardly know her! Get a load of my Johnson & Johnson! Now listen up baby if you liked what you got Then come again for another shot And bring all your girlfriends, I'll find them a slot I keep my vials cold and my patients hot He's your Vaccine Daddy I'll turn on the charm (Your Vaccine Daddy) For your upper arm (He's your Vaccine Daddy) We'll be immunizin' (Vaccine Daddy) Til the sun is risin' My diagnosis is I love you a lot And your injection site is my favorite spot Vaccine Daddy "Vaccine Daddy" by Richard Cheese
Lyrics written by Mark Jonathan Davis © Copyright 2021 Mark Jonathan Davis Published by IdeatownUSA Recordings (ASCAP) |
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"I Was Drunk"
by Richard Cheese Lyrics by Mark Jonathan Davis Richard Cheese's album "Numbers Of The Beast" includes this intoxicating original song. I was drunk when I wrote this I was drunk when I wrote this I was drunk when I wrote this I wrote this song when I was drunk I was drunk when I sang this I was drunk when I sang this I was drunk when I sang this I sang this when I was drunk I was drunk when I released this I was drunk when I released this I was drunk when I released this I released this because I was drunk You were drunk when you bought this You were drunk when you bought this You were drunk when you bought this When you bought this you must have been drunk I wrote this when I was drunk "I Was Drunk" by Richard Cheese
Lyrics written by Mark Jonathan Davis © Copyright 2020 Mark Jonathan Davis Published by IdeatownUSA Recordings (ASCAP) |
"New Birthday Song"
by Richard Cheese Lyrics by Mark Jonathan Davis Richard Cheese's original birthday song, from his 2011 "A Lounge Supreme" album. It's ________'s birthday What a great day Everyone say Happy birthday! Hey! "Richard Cheese's New Birthday Song" by Richard Cheese
Lyrics written by Mark Jonathan Davis Music by Mark Jonathan Davis and Noel Melanio © Copyright 2011 Mark Jonathan Davis Published by IdeatownUSA Recordings / Asian Boss Music(ASCAP) |
"The Friday Song"
by Richard Cheese Lyrics by Mark Jonathan Davis and Rob Izenberg A swingin' new original song from Richard Cheese's 2015 "Supermassive Black Tux" album. Monday I've got the go to work blues By Tuesday my job makes me want to snooze Wednesday the boss starts busting my hump And Thursday I'm in that work week slump But on Friday when the whistle blows at five It means the weekend has finally arrived Oh Friday (Friday!) Thank God you're here (Thank God, Thank God you're here!) You're better than Christmas You're my favorite day of the year "Here's a verse for the kids..." Five days a week I sit in school Gettin' a daily dose of the golden rule I try to stay awake so I will pass But those teachers are a pain in the class So on Friday when they ring that final bell I'm ready to raise some h-e-l-l Oh Friday (Friday!) Thank God you're here (Thank God, Thank God you're here!) You're better than Christmas You're my favorite day of the year Yeah, St. Patty's is fun, and so is Turkey Day And I'm a big fan of Superbowl Sunday But keep your Valentines, Halloweens, and Fourths of July The best D-A-Y starts with F-R-I So when the real world starts gettin' me down I think of that day that's comin' around Friday is here to set me free It's the greatest day in history If you want the weekend to get here soon Listen to Richard Cheese and sing this tune Oh Friday (Friday!) Thank God you're here (Thank God, Thank God you're here!) You're better than Christmas You're my favorite day of the year It's not Monday (not Wednesday!) Not Tuesday (not Sunday!) Not Wednesday (not Tuesday!) Not Thursday (not Monday!) It's Friday (Friday!) Thank God you're here It's not New Year's, or Earth Day It's better than payday and your birthday It's Friday (Friday!) Thank God you're here (Friday!) "The Friday Song" by Richard Cheese
Lyrics written by Rob Izenberg and Mark Jonathan Davis Music by Rob Izenberg © Copyright 2015 Mark Jonathan Davis Published by 660AM Music (ASCAP) and IdeatownUSA Recordings (ASCAP) |
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